I've done it again...

  The main problem I'm having is that I have no guts to say.. And I know I'm wrong..... I know that it would not happen between us.. And i too know that it is wrong to be in a relationship because Its wrong.... Its terribly wrong if its us but I can't help but to like or have feelings for you.. Its not what or how I used to feel when I'm around you.. Its much different now... I used to be stern and not very nice because I don't wanna spoil you.. Or  maybe I'm scared maybe this would happened... Now.. I really done it.. I have feelings for you but I have no guts to tell or be with you.. I try to avoid you but I just can't help myself but to look at you and do anything in order to be with you.... But its wrong.. Its really wrong.. I feel sad when you do.. I feel lost when your not with me... When you are angry or sad, I wanna be by your side and listen to you and your frustration. I wanna see you smile because your smile lights me up as well.. It gives me such warmth and makes me happy too.. But I know time is short and I won't be able to see you anytime soon after the results come out.. I'll have to start my new life and lead a life that I might not be able to change when I start.  I wanna let you know how I feel but I don't want you to ignore me  if you don't have feelings for me after I tell you... I'm not sure of your feeling bout me before this.. but an hour ago... I realised that Im not that important to you.. I'm but just a tool or  maybe you should say, You'll be with me in order to get what you need.. But when something is done and when you don't need me.. I'm left aside until the next time you feel like talking or use me... Cause you don't even care if I'm unhappy.. You want me to wait.. You don't care if I'm alone walking or whether if I'm safe... So am I doing it right by not telling you or is it just chicken of me for not telling you??? I really don't know..